Today I'm honoured to have as my guest my writing mentor, my friend, my editor, writer, author and owner of Café Spike an online magazine. Ian Youngs also known as Skoob1999 and Martin Shuttlecock.
Ian welcome and thank you not just for being my guest today but for the magic you sprinkle into to my fictional stories In Fantasies From The Kitchen Sink and the adventures of Fifi La Mott over at Café Spike. It's lovely to have you here.
You're welcome Fiona. I'm never sure where I am most of the time and I don't like talking about myself a lot because I'm basically very boring.
Where did it all begin, and when did you first start tapping the keyboard and sending your stories into Cyber Space ?
It all started in Hope Hospital, Salford. That's where I was born, just down the road from Old Trafford. And The Cliff, United's old training ground was just down the road from where I lived as a child so I'm naturally a United fan, although I went to Maine Road before I ever went to Old Trafford. I was forced into that and always tried to avoid the place. I survived by some kind of fluke and kind of drifted through life until I got to where I am today. I live down on the south coast now, but that's a long, long story. I'm still a Northern monkey at heart, the type who likes beer, fags and pies. I love soul music too - the late great Marvin Gaye was lucky enough to be in the same room as me twice at the Apollo down Ardwick Green back in the day. He did a bit of singing and piano playing. I just sat there listening.
As regards keyboard tapping - I saw a website and decided to have a go at writing comedy articles. I've been writing for as long as I can remember, I suppose because I just like writing. It's hard to explain. I used to work for a big multi-national corporation and used to make up joke posters that used to get faxed all over the world, which was nice. It was all happy days for quite a long time writing articles for the spoof news website, until the realisation came to me that some people just do that stuff for some kind of ego trip, with no respect for their readers. Basically there were people conning readers into clicking on headlines when there was little, if anything of any substance behind the headline.
A group of us got together and tried to change things. We tried to persuade people to forget about amassing points and concentrate on writing genuinely funny and/or interesting pieces as opposed to knob jokes and celebrity gossip stuff. In the end we got shouted down and the points whores won, so we moved on. That site's still going but in my opinion it isn't a patch on what it was when we were there - or what it potentially could have been.
Café Spike came about by accident really. It was never my intention to take the reins, but after a couple of other attempts to set a website up by writing mates failed I just went ahead and did it. I hadn't a clue what I was doing and still don't really. It's been a steep learning curve but I think we're getting there.
Where do you hope to take Café Spike in the future?
Wherever the contributors want to take it. I'm hoping to have a place where people can write and get published without too many restrictions. One thing I've learned since we got this thing rolling is that creative people don't take too kindly to being shoe-horned into boxes or restricted by over zealous guidelines. I try not to interfere. Fortunately the people writing for us seem to think along roughly the same lines so there's very little conflict. Having said that, we do like to have things properly presented so we go out of our way to get things right. Going back to the question - I'd like for us to be a fun site where people drop in to be entertained and like us enough to want to revisit. If we build some kind of fan base that'll be good enough for me.
Will we see more of your work on paper as in the next Dorking Review?
The next Dorking Review is more or less ready to roll but there was a glitch with the illustrations. I've been in touch with the editor, Gary Moore and I've pitched the idea of illustrations to a couple of artists. Hopefully I'll be able to help out on that front, and we'll be able to get things moving. I haven't given much thought to writing anything as a solo project because I have a full time job, a family and other interests and that and Café Spike mean that there isn't much time left for anything else.
Do you enjoy the editing side of the magazine?
Again, it wasn't ever my intention to get involved with that side of things, but I've noticed over the years that some writers have great ideas and come up with some very amusing stuff, yet struggle for a variety of reasons with the basics. If I can help out a little in that respect I'm more than happy to do so. Usually it's just a case of tidying up a few typos. I don't do sweeping changes to submissions because I think it's important for the writer not to have their original idea mangled beyond all recognition. I hate editing my own stuff though. That drives me mad.
Why comedy and satire?
I don't really know. It's the hardest thing to do as a writer. It's easy to make somebody cry, or get them riled up but making somebody laugh out loud is a tough call. I rarely laugh aloud at the printed word, although I recall cracking up reading 'The Wanderers' by Richard Wright and a Monty Python paperback, likewise with Spike Milligan's books, but I've laughed more since I started doing the online stuff. I'm lucky to have met a fine bunch of very funny people who've been inspirational - I don't need to name drop because they know who they are. Some of them are having difficult times at the moment for a variety of reasons and that's hard to take on a personal level sometimes because these people are friends, and it's been my privilege to get to know them.
Right - I'm off down the pub now.
http://www.cafespike.com/
Saturday, 14 September 2013
Friday, 13 September 2013
Fantasies From The Kitchen Sink #4
June 20, 2013
More from Fifi La Mott and Captain Jean-Luc
Dorking Community Centre was a hive of activity. Ted Pemberton, Jim Blackcock, and Frederick Mansell all peered through the half open kitchen door as Fifi La Mott took to the floor. She was about to discuss her best selling novel: “ The Life and Crimes Of A Newcastle Stripper.”
Ted Pemberton, Dorking’s notorious book reviewer, took a large gulp from his hip flask, which contained his favourite tipple of Chivas Regal 25. “Nice arse,” he said a bit too loudly, as several vexed ladies’ heads snapped round to shush him.
Giggling like schoolboys, the three old men quickly closed the kitchen door.
They had volunteered their services to The Women’s Institute, as part of a sly, conniving plan of gaining access to Fifi La Mott, the sexy authoress. They had each volunteered to help carry the buffet and set out tables and chairs.
A large gathering was expected.
Hilda and Katy gave the men strict instructions that they must to be on their best behaviour and stay in the kitchen, whilst Fifi read an excerpt from her book and answered questions.
A loud knock on the kitchen window made the spying men jump with fright.
It was General Frankie.
The American ex-marine, had retired to Dorking, with his brassy wife Mimi, six months earlier. Already he had found his new platoon in Jim, Ted and Frederick. The men were on a mission.
“Bugger me Frankie! You could have killed Fredrick. He’s got a dicky heart,” hissed Ted, as he let Frankie into the kitchen through the back door.
“Okay men no, need for any alarm,” said Frankie raising his hands to surrender. “What’s the plan of action?”
“Bring Fifi to her knees,” replied Jim Blackcock, rubbing his crotch.
Jim Blackcock was always rubbing his crotch. It was common knowledge in Dorking that he was a dirty old man. No lady’s bottom was safe from Jim’s grubby little hands.
“What are these?” said Frederick, lifting the cellophane from a large tray of what appeared to be chocolate cakes. Immediately becoming pre-occupied by the delicious aroma.
“Chocolate Brownies ya stupid prick,” cackled Ted, turning to offer General Frankie a hit of his gentleman’s finest scotch from his flask.
“They smell lovely. I think Fifi La Mott made them,” said Frederick, mesmerised by dark, rich fondant swirls with sprinkles of what Frederick thought was chocolate. “Ya don’t think anybody would miss a few do ya?” He stuffed the biggest one into his mouth before handing the tray round to the other pensioners, who all greedily snatched at the cakes.
The chocolate brownies were the ones Fifi had baked earlier and deliberately handed to Frederick with a knowing sexy smile. She knew he wouldn’t able to help himself.
Fifi had used a recipe given to her by her friend Elspeth Taylor-Beverly Hills, the drag artist whom Fifi sometimes worked with back in Newcastle. Elspeth had a liking for cannabis sprinkles; she sprinkled everything she baked with the drug, which she personally imported from Amsterdam in her knickers.
Fifi finished reading the excerpt from her book and opened the floor to questions.
Hilda Blackcock was the first to stand and wave her hand .
Fifi smiled at Hilda’s floral dress and fuchsia pink lipstick. She reminded her of Mrs Slocomb from the television programme “Are You Being Served”
“Yes Hilda?”
“Fifi dear, have you really had sex with all those men, and did you really have a threesome with two Ethiopian Catholic priests when you went on holiday to Rome?”
Fifi smiled coyly. “What do you think Hilda?”
“I hope so deary, I really do!” answered Hilda excitedly
“Well, there’s your answer,” winked Fifi. “Next question please?”
“Fifi” said Mrs Patel jumping up from her seat. “As you know we ladies here at the Women’s Institute participated in a nude calendar last year. Well, what I wanted to ask was would you consider teaching us how to pole dance?”
The room erupted with the sound of applause. The questions flowed thick and fast. The evening was a great success.
Fifi agreed at the end of the session to set up a pole dancing class at the community centre.
Her publisher, who had driven in from London stood quietly observing at the back of the room. Fifi had sold 100 books in an hour. He always knew he would be onto a winner with Fifi. He climbed back into his Aston Martin and sped off to meet a pretty little English rose in a hotel room in Chelsea.
Fifi couldn’t wait to get home to tell Jean-Luc all about the evening’s events.
First she had to check her mission had been a success.
As it was such a warm pleasant evening she decided walk home via the town. In the distance Fifi could just make out a large sign for New Tesco Extra.
To her amusement, there up against the shop window in a star shaped position with his arms and legs sprawled apart and his chest pressed against the glass was Ted Pemberton. His tongue appeared to licking an advertisement for a large bowl of tortellini.
Ted Pemberton, Dorking’s eccentric controversial book reviewer, was stoned and intoxicated. This was nothing new. But licking advertisements in shop windows certainly was!
“Good evening Ted…are you all right?” asked Fifi, trying not to laugh.
Ted slowly removed his tongue from the window. His eyes rolled to the back of his head as he attempted to focus on her.
“I can’t move! I’m stuck! I’ve been like this for an hour or more! Help me!”
“I’d be a bit more careful if I were you Ted,” warned Fifi. “I’m sure I have just seen someone from the Dorking Review pulling into the car park. You wouldn’t want this picture on the front page of tomorrow’s paper now would you?”
.
She turned on her heel and walked away… just as the curious reporter spotted Ted and made a beeline for him.
Ted wasn’t the only one Fifi saw on her leisurely walk home. As she approached the lane where her pretty little cottage sat, there hiding in the bushes with his mail order binoculars round his neck, was Frederick Mansell.
“I’ll knock and tell Katy where you are shall I Fredrick?” Fifi called out as she strolled by. Fredrick scurried back into the hedgerow like a sewer rat.
General Frankie who lived in the largest house in the lane was in his garden, ranting to some brightly painted garden gnomes.
“Hey girly! Wanna come see what real men are made of?” called Frankie just before collapsing unconscious into a bed of dahlias.
Smiling to herself Fifi walked towards her house. She could see her neighbours Hilda and Jim Blackcock. They were dancing the tango naked in their front room. The curtains wide open for anyonel to see. It wasn’t a pretty sight.
Fifi closed the front door behind her and kicked off her shoes. She removed her poodles, Spock and Kirk, from their leads, then slowly climbed the stairs to her bedroom where Captain Jean-Luc was patiently waiting for her.
“The log Fifi,” he commanded, as she entered the room.
Fifi sat at her writing bureau and opened her laptop.
“Mission Hash Cakes accomplished Jean-Luc,” she said, whilst typing feverishly. “Ted Pemberton will make tomorrow’s news. Front-page headline: ‘Dorking Book Reviewer Caught Licking Tesco’s Window’.”
“Next mission Fifi – pole dancing fundraiser at the Women’s Institute,” dictated Jean-Luc.
Just then Fifi’s phone started ringing. It was Maureen, Fifi’s friend who lived in Australia. Maureen was internationally renowned as ‘The Orgasmic Chef.’
Fifi’s eyes twinkled. Long gone were the days of making jam and singing ‘Jerusalem’ at Dorking’s Women’s Institute. Fifi had arrived.
“Hi Maureen. What’s new? Really? Tell me more!”
Join me again soon for more of Fifi’s adventures here at Café Spike.
Visit Maureen at: www.orgasmicchef.com – for food that’s better than sex. (Allegedly.)
Story – Fiona McAndrew. Follow me on Twitter @twtfiona
Dorking Community Centre was a hive of activity. Ted Pemberton, Jim Blackcock, and Frederick Mansell all peered through the half open kitchen door as Fifi La Mott took to the floor. She was about to discuss her best selling novel: “ The Life and Crimes Of A Newcastle Stripper.”
Ted Pemberton, Dorking’s notorious book reviewer, took a large gulp from his hip flask, which contained his favourite tipple of Chivas Regal 25. “Nice arse,” he said a bit too loudly, as several vexed ladies’ heads snapped round to shush him.
Giggling like schoolboys, the three old men quickly closed the kitchen door.
They had volunteered their services to The Women’s Institute, as part of a sly, conniving plan of gaining access to Fifi La Mott, the sexy authoress. They had each volunteered to help carry the buffet and set out tables and chairs.
A large gathering was expected.
Hilda and Katy gave the men strict instructions that they must to be on their best behaviour and stay in the kitchen, whilst Fifi read an excerpt from her book and answered questions.
A loud knock on the kitchen window made the spying men jump with fright.
It was General Frankie.
The American ex-marine, had retired to Dorking, with his brassy wife Mimi, six months earlier. Already he had found his new platoon in Jim, Ted and Frederick. The men were on a mission.
“Bugger me Frankie! You could have killed Fredrick. He’s got a dicky heart,” hissed Ted, as he let Frankie into the kitchen through the back door.
“Okay men no, need for any alarm,” said Frankie raising his hands to surrender. “What’s the plan of action?”
“Bring Fifi to her knees,” replied Jim Blackcock, rubbing his crotch.
Jim Blackcock was always rubbing his crotch. It was common knowledge in Dorking that he was a dirty old man. No lady’s bottom was safe from Jim’s grubby little hands.
“What are these?” said Frederick, lifting the cellophane from a large tray of what appeared to be chocolate cakes. Immediately becoming pre-occupied by the delicious aroma.
“Chocolate Brownies ya stupid prick,” cackled Ted, turning to offer General Frankie a hit of his gentleman’s finest scotch from his flask.
“They smell lovely. I think Fifi La Mott made them,” said Frederick, mesmerised by dark, rich fondant swirls with sprinkles of what Frederick thought was chocolate. “Ya don’t think anybody would miss a few do ya?” He stuffed the biggest one into his mouth before handing the tray round to the other pensioners, who all greedily snatched at the cakes.
The chocolate brownies were the ones Fifi had baked earlier and deliberately handed to Frederick with a knowing sexy smile. She knew he wouldn’t able to help himself.
Fifi had used a recipe given to her by her friend Elspeth Taylor-Beverly Hills, the drag artist whom Fifi sometimes worked with back in Newcastle. Elspeth had a liking for cannabis sprinkles; she sprinkled everything she baked with the drug, which she personally imported from Amsterdam in her knickers.
Fifi finished reading the excerpt from her book and opened the floor to questions.
Hilda Blackcock was the first to stand and wave her hand .
Fifi smiled at Hilda’s floral dress and fuchsia pink lipstick. She reminded her of Mrs Slocomb from the television programme “Are You Being Served”
“Yes Hilda?”
“Fifi dear, have you really had sex with all those men, and did you really have a threesome with two Ethiopian Catholic priests when you went on holiday to Rome?”
Fifi smiled coyly. “What do you think Hilda?”
“I hope so deary, I really do!” answered Hilda excitedly
“Well, there’s your answer,” winked Fifi. “Next question please?”
“Fifi” said Mrs Patel jumping up from her seat. “As you know we ladies here at the Women’s Institute participated in a nude calendar last year. Well, what I wanted to ask was would you consider teaching us how to pole dance?”
The room erupted with the sound of applause. The questions flowed thick and fast. The evening was a great success.
Fifi agreed at the end of the session to set up a pole dancing class at the community centre.
Her publisher, who had driven in from London stood quietly observing at the back of the room. Fifi had sold 100 books in an hour. He always knew he would be onto a winner with Fifi. He climbed back into his Aston Martin and sped off to meet a pretty little English rose in a hotel room in Chelsea.
Fifi couldn’t wait to get home to tell Jean-Luc all about the evening’s events.
First she had to check her mission had been a success.
As it was such a warm pleasant evening she decided walk home via the town. In the distance Fifi could just make out a large sign for New Tesco Extra.
To her amusement, there up against the shop window in a star shaped position with his arms and legs sprawled apart and his chest pressed against the glass was Ted Pemberton. His tongue appeared to licking an advertisement for a large bowl of tortellini.
Ted Pemberton, Dorking’s eccentric controversial book reviewer, was stoned and intoxicated. This was nothing new. But licking advertisements in shop windows certainly was!
“Good evening Ted…are you all right?” asked Fifi, trying not to laugh.
Ted slowly removed his tongue from the window. His eyes rolled to the back of his head as he attempted to focus on her.
“I can’t move! I’m stuck! I’ve been like this for an hour or more! Help me!”
“I’d be a bit more careful if I were you Ted,” warned Fifi. “I’m sure I have just seen someone from the Dorking Review pulling into the car park. You wouldn’t want this picture on the front page of tomorrow’s paper now would you?”
.
She turned on her heel and walked away… just as the curious reporter spotted Ted and made a beeline for him.
Ted wasn’t the only one Fifi saw on her leisurely walk home. As she approached the lane where her pretty little cottage sat, there hiding in the bushes with his mail order binoculars round his neck, was Frederick Mansell.
“I’ll knock and tell Katy where you are shall I Fredrick?” Fifi called out as she strolled by. Fredrick scurried back into the hedgerow like a sewer rat.
General Frankie who lived in the largest house in the lane was in his garden, ranting to some brightly painted garden gnomes.
“Hey girly! Wanna come see what real men are made of?” called Frankie just before collapsing unconscious into a bed of dahlias.
Smiling to herself Fifi walked towards her house. She could see her neighbours Hilda and Jim Blackcock. They were dancing the tango naked in their front room. The curtains wide open for anyonel to see. It wasn’t a pretty sight.
Fifi closed the front door behind her and kicked off her shoes. She removed her poodles, Spock and Kirk, from their leads, then slowly climbed the stairs to her bedroom where Captain Jean-Luc was patiently waiting for her.
“The log Fifi,” he commanded, as she entered the room.
Fifi sat at her writing bureau and opened her laptop.
“Mission Hash Cakes accomplished Jean-Luc,” she said, whilst typing feverishly. “Ted Pemberton will make tomorrow’s news. Front-page headline: ‘Dorking Book Reviewer Caught Licking Tesco’s Window’.”
“Next mission Fifi – pole dancing fundraiser at the Women’s Institute,” dictated Jean-Luc.
Just then Fifi’s phone started ringing. It was Maureen, Fifi’s friend who lived in Australia. Maureen was internationally renowned as ‘The Orgasmic Chef.’
Fifi’s eyes twinkled. Long gone were the days of making jam and singing ‘Jerusalem’ at Dorking’s Women’s Institute. Fifi had arrived.
“Hi Maureen. What’s new? Really? Tell me more!”
Join me again soon for more of Fifi’s adventures here at Café Spike.
Visit Maureen at: www.orgasmicchef.com – for food that’s better than sex. (Allegedly.)
Story – Fiona McAndrew. Follow me on Twitter @twtfiona
FIRST CRACK
ESPRESSO
Sunday, 28 July 2013
Author Of Churchmouse Tales And The Dorking Review Gary Moore.
My quest today is author of The Dorking Review and Churchmouse Tales, Gary Moore.
Gary thank you so much for being my quest today.
Who is Gary Moore the man? Gary, along with two other writers Skoob and Frank Jordan, have mentored me with regards to my own writing over the last few months.
Basically a middle-aged Englishman living and working in France. I have had an interesting life up to now. Ex-businessman, ex-army officer, ex-debt collector, and currently working as a heating engineer. I'm trying to figure out why my career seems to have developed backwards rather than forwards. I've dined with millionaires and drank with paupers and I've now got a much better understanding of human nature than I had when I was in my twenties. Can't understand why I'm skint! Still, much better to be happy I reckon.
Tell me, where it all began, when did you first start writing?.
How did it all begin? Well probably the story side was from about 8 years old. I had an English teacher at junior school who was either brilliant or lazy, I'm still not sure which. Anyway, once a week we had to go in front of the class and talk about anything we liked. Most of the kids were up there for a few seconds, but I would stand there and make up stories for the rest of the class and would rattle on for ten minutes or so. Ten years later I'd forgotten all about it when a girl sat next to me on a bus that was taking me to college (engineering rather than humanities) and she recognised me from junior school and remarked on how much she had enjoyed the stories that I used to make up, so I suppose that it's always been there.
The writing side came much later, only about six or seven years ago. I was walking in my garden when a fully formed story came into my head. i know that may seem strange but that's actually what happened, and I felt compelled to write it down. It took over two years to do it, but I ended up with a 70,000 word manuscript for a novel. The problem was that although I could think up the stories I'd never really been taught how to write properly and so figuring that writing was a cheaper and less harmful hobby than going to the pub I set out to learn how to put my stuff together in a more presentable (and readable) format. The manuscript is now currently gathering dust in a drawer and needs a complete re-write. looking at it now I can see a multitude of errors in it, but at the time, like all new writers I was half convinced that publishers would be beating a path to my door for it.
What inspired you to write Churchmouse Tales and then The Dorking Review.
Churchmouse Tales came about after I'd been posting on a writer's site on the internet for a couple of years. I'd found that I had the ability to write short humorous pieces and that people seemed to like them. I'd started to put some of them together to make up a self-publish book with the idea of sending it to the mainstream publishers; the idea being that they would give a finished book more attention than a slack handful of paper before throwing it in the bin. One of the other members of the site was starting his own publishing house and knowing my work, and that I had a book ready to go offered to publish it for me, which was great as it cost me nothing and everytime a copy is sold I get a dollar. I think that I'm up to about 10 bucks by now!
The Dorking Review came about as I'd found another site that did fake news stories where the writers simply posted them up. Around five percent of the stuff on the site was very good material and it occurred to me that I could put together a book of these articles very quickly as they already existed. I contacted the writers with the idea and my publisher agreed to run it and the whole thing was put together in around six months.
You also edited The Dorking Review is editing something you have done in the past.
Not really, but having used the forums on a number of internet writing sites helped. Also realising that it takes a lot of hard work to become proficient as a writer was very useful and I tried to pass on what I had learned to others. It was actually an interesting thing to do as I saw a little bit of how it works from the other side. All writers get very involved in their work and it can sometimes be difficult to explain why their stuff can't be used. You say to a writer "We're making a book about trains. go and write me some features for it". Off they will go and three months later they'll come back with a load of stories about boats. You then say "I can't use this. I need stuff about trains". "But it's brilliant" they'll say, and it all ends up them thinking that you can't recognise good writing, and you wondering why you asked them in the first place.
Are you planning to write more books in the future.
There's a second Dorking Review ready to come out as soon as we have the illustrations, and I'll probably put together a third sometime next year. I've also got a possibility of ghost writing a biography for a bomb-disposal expert but I don't know if it's going to happen or not, and won't know for another few months. I've also been writing a few humorous articles on business and finance under the banner of 'Triumphs of Marketing' for www.cafeSpike which seem to be well received and I'll probably start hawking them around the trade press to see if anyone is interested. At the moment it's more about self publicity and making the right contacts which is something that I'm not very good at. Realistically it will be at least another two or three years before I can make enough income from it to think about writing full time.
Thanks very much Gary.
Thanks very much Gary.

Sunday, 21 April 2013
Katarina Fropond Talks Satire, Novels And Her Brother Horror Author Gerard Gray.
Today I'm delighted to have my cousin satirical writer Katarina Frogpond, or known by her other pen name Edie Gray.
Katarina it's lovely to have you here today thanks so much for being my guest. Lets get straight to it.
When did you first start writing.
I can’t remember. It was such a long time ago. But I do remember I was writing my first sci-fi book at the age of 15. It was about a space satellite that could talk. I enjoyed writing it, and then I subsequently enjoyed putting it in the bin.
How did writing for The Huffington Post come about?
I started writing my comedy review column for the Huffington Post because I knew a lot of comedy writers who made me laugh and I wanted everyone to know about them too. At the time I was writing for Spoof News, and I wrote with writers whose stories were regularly read by 10,000 people a day. They were people like Skoob, and Iain B, and Jaggedone, who were like the graffiti artists of Political satire. They wrote prolifically, and quite often it wouldn’t be unusual to find myself talking to a Spoof Writer on the Spoof Forum who had as many as 2000 articles in his back catalogue. I found that impressive. But whenever I spoke to friends who wrote in the paper journals, they didn’t know who these writers were, even though their articles were at the top of the Google pages every day.
So I started the column to highlight these Spoof writer’s work, and eventually, they began writing books and I reviewed their books, too. But shortly after I started writing for the Huffington Post Blog, my computer got hijacked by web pirates and I began to write a bit about web pirates, too. So my blog became quite diverse for a while, but now it has returned to being mostly about comedy writing again. If any of my Spoof friends tell me they are writing a book, they let me know and I review it for them. The last one was Erskine Quint, Intrepid Adventurer, Extraordinaire. It was one of the best books I’ve read in a long time. It’s worth a read.
Have you always loved comedy?
Yes. I have. It was the shining light in our dark childhood. Our family had a lot of problems but we all had an amazing sense of humour, and we just laughed our way through the dark times. I remember my first comedy memories were of watching The Young Ones, BlackAdder and Monty Python with my Dad and my brother. But later I loved Father Ted, The IT Crowd, The Thick of It and Peep show. My favourite comedy series at the moment is The Big Bang Theory, but it worries me because I think I can see a bit too much of myself in Sheldon. Not so much the mathematical genius bit, because I can’t count, but the obsession with comic book heroes and sci-fi adventure books. I’m thinking of getting the box set, actually.
But, its not just actual comedy that makes me laugh. I see a lot of humour in politics. I think Ed Miliband is very funny. His PMQ retorts make me laugh a lot. And even though I know his one-liners have been written by a committee of speech-writers, he does deliver them with good comic timing. I think he should consider a career move to stand up comedy.
What do you think of your brother's self published recent success with his debut Novel Dead Broken?
You have written three Novels of your own. Will you be self-publishing them also. If so, when can we expect to see them on the Amazon shelf?
I’m not sure. I’ve got one book that could be published at the end of the year on Amazon, if I really work hard with the editing, but the other three are stories that need illustrated. And I’ll have to wait until my artistic skills catch up with my writing skills before I can even think of publishing those. It’s an ongoing project that may never end, but that’s the way I like my projects. My books are a lifelong project. I’ve always got something on the go. It’s just what I do.
My favourite spoof Article from you is “Margaret Thatcher’s Basement Secrets Reavealed” which I think is hilarious. Where do you get your ideas from?
Ha. Ha. That was one of my favourites, too. It was part of the Tory Zombie series that I wrote for Spoof News. I mostly wrote these stories when I was angry with the Tories, usually after watching Prime Ministers Question time, or Newsnight. I was worried about the desensitisation of government. The newly elected Tory party seemed to be picking on the poorest, weakest people in our society. They seemed to be attacking disabled people and people who, for one reason or another, had found themselves dependent on benefits. I thought the Tory policies were heartless and cruel, and that’s when I realised that it would be quite sensible and funny to portray them as zombies.
It was shortly after that, that I created the Tory Zombie series. And after I had created my monsters, I realised I needed some heroes too - superheroes - and I decided that if the Tories were the zombies, then the veteran members of the old socialist Labour party would have to be the superheroes. Then, obviously, they would all fight each other in a secret war.
I had so much fun with these. But when I wrote them, I also had a lot of optimism. I thought that the Tories were so obviously wrong in attacking the poor people in our society that someone would stop them. But nobody did. And I think we have entered a very sad time in our political history, and it just made me feel defeated when I watched the terrible things the Tories continued to do on Newsnight, so I stopped watching it. And that’s why I more or less stopped writing the zombie series. The superheroes stopped fighting and the Zombies won.
In a recent telephone conversation between us, I referred to us jokingly as the modern day Bronte's. You said Gerard would be Emily. What did you mean by that?
I just meant his writing is a bit dark. He tends to like to look at the dark side of reality and I like to look on the bright side. But he’s not as miserable as Emily was. There is a lot of humour in his books. I think Iain Banks reader’s would understand it and Val McDiarmid talked about this kind of dark Scottish Humour when she wrote in a recent tribute to Iain Banks that “I'd grown up with the Scottish sense of humour, so I had no trouble with the notion that something so dark, so disturbing and so bleak could also be laugh-out-loud funny. I'd just never seen it written down before.” I think this describes Gerard’s humour very well, and if Emily were alive today I think she’d be writing in this style.
That leaves the question of which one of the Bronte's is you and which one would I be. You known what Kat, I think we will leave the answer to that question for another day! We will save it for Café Spike!
Thanks so much everyone for dropping by.
You can follow Katarina Frogpond on Twitter @DeltaPanda
Or why not read some of Katarina's work over at The Spoof . http://www.thespoof.com/news/uk/84946/margaret-thatchers-basement-secrets-revealed
That leaves the question of which one of the Bronte's is you and which one would I be. You known what Kat, I think we will leave the answer to that question for another day! We will save it for Café Spike!
Thanks so much everyone for dropping by.
You can follow Katarina Frogpond on Twitter @DeltaPanda
Or why not read some of Katarina's work over at The Spoof . http://www.thespoof.com/news/uk/84946/margaret-thatchers-basement-secrets-revealed
Sunday, 7 April 2013
Horror Author Gerard Gray
A question Q&A session with Gerard Gray author of "Dead Broken".
Gerard thanks very much for
agreeing to be my guest today. Also let me congratulate you on the amazing
success of your debut novel "Dead Broken" currently riding high in
the Amazon Horror charts. You must be delighted by your achievement.
Yes, but I just got
lucky. I happen to know a lot of very nice people on Facebook and twitter –
they helped me loads. It was still nice, though. The book got 10000 downloads
over the free promotion, mostly in the UK. In the week that followed I sold
close to 700 books, and it is still selling J. If it’s OK, I need to send out a big thank you to
every one who posted, tweeted or talked about the book. Oh, and a big thank you
to everyone who bought it. I hope it wasn’t too disturbing J
Did you ever envisage the
book would be as popular as it is?
No. Getting to number 2
in the horror charts, second only to the great James Herbert, was a fantastic
privilege. In saying that it’s just a hobby, and I’d like to keep it that way.
I have a couple more books in me, but I like the idea of being able to write
them at my own pace. That’s the beauty of going Indie.
What inspired you to write a
dark psychological thriller/horror?
I have always loved
horror – I get it from my mum. I can remember being very young and asking her
what the book sitting beside her bed was. She said the name of the book was
Rats by James Herbert. She said it was frightening. My mum loved a good horror
story, and it wasn’t long before she had me following suit. At the age of eight
she let me watch all the Hammer House of Horror series. At the age of nine our
favourite family movie was Halloween! I think I know where I get my love of
horror from.
In the book the main
character Peter Murphy battles with his father’s bi polar disorder and his
mother’s depression. It's also been said in a review that you give a refreshing
honest insight into grief. Were these difficult subjects to write about?
Yes. I actually did grow
up in a household blighted with mental illness – my dad was a manic-depressive,
and my mum suffered from depression on occasion. It was a big part of my early
life, which is why I find myself writing about it time and time again. In
saying that, I had one seriously happy childhood. Both my parents were
fantastic. I miss them loads.
Are you writing a
sequel? Are we going to hear more from Gerard Gray?
I am, but it’s a difficult
one for me. I don’t think writing about the last days of your mum would be easy
for anyone. In saying that, Dead Broken isn’t my first book. I have a book
prior to this one already written. I have plans to make it a prequel to Dead
Broken, but I need to write the sequel first. Then I’ll go back and re-write
the prequel and fit it in. It all goes a bit crazy in the prequel!!
In case the reader is not
aware, you and I are cousins. Your sister is the Huffington post Blogger,
Katarina Frogpond, who is also hoping to publish her own books in the very near
future. When the three of us re-connected recently, were you as surprised as I
was at how many of us in the family share a love of words?
Yes, but I suppose I
shouldn’t have been. We have a very creative family. I don’t think it ends at
the written word, either. I’ve written songs from about the age of 13, and some
of our cousins have actually released albums. We even enjoy painting. But you
are right – it’s our love of words that has brought us back together. I suppose
it’s all in the genes J
Thank you Gerard and thank you for dropping by. X
Below is an excerpt from Dead Broken currently available on Amazon.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Dead-Broken-Psychological-Thriller-ebook/dp/B009STIN94/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1362902677&sr=8-1
Follow Gerard on Twitter @GerardGray101
Below is an excerpt from Dead Broken currently available on Amazon.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Dead-Broken-Psychological-Thriller-ebook/dp/B009STIN94/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1362902677&sr=8-1
Follow Gerard on Twitter @GerardGray101
I could see
myself walking into the past, walking up to my parents’ front door. I had just
spent seven hours driving up from London. On entering the house I found my dad
sitting in his mechanical chair, his tongue a lapping and a lolling, his hand
shaking back and forth. We exchanged a couple of welcoming remarks and then I
spotted my mum coming out of the kitchen. On seeing her I felt somewhat
unsettled, but my subconscious shook it off.
“The gypsy
returns,” I said jokingly.
“Come and give
me a hug, London boy.”
I gave my mum a
warm hug and then followed her into the kitchen.
“I made you a
Chilli. Are you hungry? I put fresh chillies in it.”
“Famished,” I
replied, going straight for the fridge. Right enough she had bought me some
Thai chillies.
“Ahh, chillies…”
I said, picking up the packet, stroking it jokingly against my face.
“Pete, it’s very
hot. Try it.”
I tasted the
chilli and right enough it was hot, but no way was it hot enough. I am addicted
to chillies; at least I was before my stomach problems began.
I looked at my
mum again. She looked weathered and worn, but quite well.
“Are you OK?”
“Huh…” she
huffed, expelling a puff of exasperated air. “Him. I don’t know how much more I
can take.”
I turned around
to look at my dad. He was sitting in his chair, a fat, failing invalid. I
looked at my mum. I wasn’t sure how to take this. Recently she had gone from
being the angel of my youth to a constantly moaning hypochondriac. My sister
blamed her German friend, Helga, and I tended to agree.
I looked back at
my dad. The poor man had just been in care for six weeks while my mum had had
her knee operation. My sister had told me that she had been moaning about him
incessantly: the horns and halo effect. As far as my mum was concerned this
little man definitely had horns. And that was why I took no notice of her. On
this occasion, I was wrong.
Why were you
wrong?
My eyes widened
in the dark. Floating in the middle of the room was a cat as clear as day, its
tail a swirling and a twirling high into the air like the smoke from a
chimneystack. It was Tiddles, but not the Tiddles of my cinema room. This
Tiddles had a head.
“Tiddles, you
found your head?”
No thanks to
you.
“What do you
mean?”
You certainly
know how to hide a head don’t you.
I winced.
Tiddles’ voice was wrong. Why was Tiddles’ voice so wrong? And then it dawned
on me. The apparition floating in the dark was that of a cat, but the voice was
still my dad’s. I felt sick and disorientated. I placed my head on the bed,
closed my eyes and attempted to escape back into my waking dream.
I returned to my
parents’ living room, my dad lying half asleep in his chair. It was like lucid
dreaming. I found myself wondering which one was the real world: the one with
the floating cat, or the one with my dad slumbering in his mechanised chair.
I sat myself
down on the sofa with an enormous plate of chilli and a bottle of Leffe. I had
asked my mum to tape me the UEFA cup match, and by some fluke of the world she
had managed it. My mum was over seventy – technical she was not. I switched on
the video. Mum had just gone to bed. My dad was sitting beside me, half
asleep.
I opened my eyes
to find the ethereal Tiddles still floating in the dark.
“Do you want to
know the score?” my dad mumbled from his armchair. He had been away at dialysis
earlier that evening. It always left him drained.
“No. Definitely
not. Don’t tell me.”
“All I’ll say
is…”
“No! Don’t tell
me.”
My dad said
nothing for a couple of seconds and then continued.
“I’ll just
say…”
“Quiet!”
“That Celtic had
a better game in the second half.”
“OK, don’t tell
me anything else.” No way did I want to know the result. If I knew the result I
wouldn’t want to watch the match.
“And I’ll just
say…”
“Dad!”
“That Larsson
got man of the match.”
The actual
implications of this conversation went far beyond the result of a football
match. In the back of my mind something was niggling, but I thought nothing
else of it. He finally mumbled something incoherent and proceeded to fall
asleep in his chair. He was exhausted.
Larsson did get
man of the match, but it wasn’t the greatest of games. Celtic drew 1-1 at home.
As I left the room to go to bed I looked back at my dad, sleeping in his chair.
He looked all but finished. Again I had that niggling feeling, but I brushed it
aside. I was tired. It was 1:30 in the morning; time for bed.
No sleep for
the wicked, aye?
I threw an angry
stare at the floating cat, but the feline didn’t flinch an inch. My glower
burned and effervesced like a flare before darkening once more. The cat was
right: the wicked had no right to rest. I think I had only been asleep for a
couple of hours when it started.
“Mary! Mary!
It’s 5.30, Mary. You need to get up.”
“Huh?” I
mumbled, stirring from my slumber.
“Pete, I’m out
of the bathroom, now. You can get in, if you like.”
What the fuck?
Was it actually five in the morning? I leaned over and looked at my phone.
Right enough it was just after five.
“Mary! I’m
hungry.”
I tried my best
to ignore my dad’s voice. It was 5.00 in the morning, so by my estimations that
meant I’d only had about four hours’ sleep. I turned over in exasperation.
“Do you want
some breakfast as well, Pete?”
“No I do not,” I
vociferously whispered. “It’s five in the morning. I work hard all week. Let me
sleep.”
My dad didn’t
seem to care how early it was. All he cared about was the fact that he was
wide-awake, so everybody else should be up as well.
My dad babbled
on incessantly for the next hour. Every minute, like clockwork, he would say
something else, his voice flowing into my room like the frothy waves on a
beach. Not quite the tranquil swill of the Bahamas, more the freezing cold wash
of a Scottish shoreline.
I eventually
managed to fall asleep, but only for about an hour. I opened my eyes to be
greeted by my dad’s manic rant once more. God only knew what time it was now,
but by the way my dad was talking it sounded like he had convinced my mum to
get out of bed.
“Mary, I want my
breakfast in my special bowl,” he said rudely. “And I think I’ll have some
toast. Are you making toast for Pete? If you are, then I want you to make me
one more slice of toast than you make for him.”
What? Did I hear
him correctly? Oh bugger. I had forgotten about this.
I slowly dragged
myself out of bed. My dad’s dressing gown was lying in the corner, so I put it
on. I staggered into the living room to find him beached in his chair as per
usual.
“Morning,” I
said. “You were up early. What the hell was all that about this morning?”
My dad looked up
at me with a sneer. “It’s my house. I make the rules in this house.”
“It’s not your
house,” I replied. “It’s yours and mum’s.”
“If I put it to
a court of law, they would rule in my favour. Your mother would get nothing.”
“What’re you
talking about?” I shook my head in a bid to dissipate the growing anger. I
quickly released the pressure by remembering that he was obviously going ill
again. No point listening to a word he said.
I walked through
to the kitchen.
“He’s going ill
again, isn’t he?”
“Do you see what
I have to put up with? He’s an ungrateful, rude little devil.”
“Mary. Bring me
my tablets.”
“Please!” I
shouted back at him.
My mum picked up
his tablets from the bench and winced. “He’s ugly. I can’t bear to look at
him.” She then disappeared into the living room. I followed her in and watched
her place the tablets down onto the little table in front of my dad.
“Thank you,” I
said, aiming the reproach at my dad for not acknowledging my mum’s kind
gesture. He ignored me, his hand shaking back and forth.
“I need a cup of
milk to take my tablets with.”
“Please!” I said
again.
“I need a cup of
milk to take my tablets with, please, thank you, please, thank you.” My dad
said this with a cheeky grin on his face. I reluctantly smiled back at him; it
was actually quite funny. My mum’s bitter mask remained stuck fast to her face,
though. She didn’t find him funny in the slightest.
I opened my eyes
and rolled over in the dark turning my back on the floating cat. I didn’t want
to think about this anymore. This was not the way I wanted to remember my dad.
Friday, 29 March 2013
Sam Irvin Award Winning Film And Television Producer
I am hugely honoured and privileged to have Hollywood film director, televison producer , screen writer, author and lecturer, Sam Irvin as my guest today.
Thank you so much Sam for taking the time to answer my questions and for sharing a part of your self, not just with me but with all who read this post.
It is a my pleasure, Fiona. Thank you so much for your interest and support.
Movies & televisonAfter I read your biography on Wikipedia. I felt it was almost your destiny to become a director in Hollywood. You have certainly travelled an amazing journey.Are you still living the dream? Is there more you feel you want to conquer?
I'm always dreaming up a thousand projects I want to conquer, so yes, absolutely, I am living the dream. Of course, the trick is to get at least a one of those dreams to become reality. My next project is directing the first season of six episodes of FROM HERE ON OUT, a sitcom for the premium gay cable network, here! TV. In the same way that 30 ROCK spoofed what goes on behind the scenes at NBC making a show like SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE, our series FROM HERE ON OUT is a behind the scenes spoof about making a low-budget gay spy series at here! TV. The scripts are hilarious and we go into production this summer (of 2013).
Author.I recently read your book Kay Thompson Funny Face To Eloise. I have to say it totally blew me away. I felt in some ways that unless you were in Hollywood/showbusiness most folk wouldn't really know who Kay Thompson was. I actually felt as a woman I had been denied what I perceived Kay Thompson to be, which is an icon for women almost to the point of feminism. She was so ahead of her time. Do you think that because of the era that she lived in that she was actually Hollywood's best kept secret?
Kay was the best kept secret in movies, TV, nightclubs, records, fashion, and children's books. Her influence had no boundaries -- yet very few people were aware of her astounding accomplishments. Part of the reason for that is because, as a women a man's world in the 1930s, 40s and 50s, she was rarely given the credit she deserved. But, she also frequently performed tasks that were deliberately kept quiet. Major stars like Frank Sinatra, Judy Garland, Noël Coward, Marlene Dietrich, Lucille Ball, Ethel Merman, Bette Davis, Lena Horne, Andy Williams, and Liza Minnelli don't like to advertise that they need a vocal coach or someone to guide their every move. Kay was very often on the sidelines, pulling the invisible strings.
I believe from what I read in your book, Kay Thompson was quite a hit here in the UK, which included a Royal fan base. Would you like to elaborate on that?
Well, the best way to answer that question is to excerpt a passage from my book about the time that Kay Thompson and her nightclub act (featuring three male backup singer-dancers) first took the UK by storm in 1950...
After a gig in Paris was cut short by poor attendance, Thompson and her trio moved on to London to reopen the Café de Paris (off London’s Piccadilly Circus) on August 28, 1950.
“Besides being the first cabaret artiste at the Café de Paris after the war,” wrote historian Charles Graves, “Kay Thompson was the first to be labeled as receiving a salary of one thousand pounds a week [$2,800].”
The money was low, but so was the workload—just six midnight shows per week, Sundays off. In addition to the usual parade of stars, members of the royal family showed up, including Princess Elizabeth and Princess Margaret.
“The reception in London was very big,” recalled George Martin (one of Kay's backup singer-dancers). “Big, big, big! They loved Kay. And business was terrific. Complete opposite of Paris.”
The powerful American newspaper columnist Walter Winchell called her “The Toast of Piccadilly,” noting that “Kay Thompson’s London notices were practically love-letters.” The duration of the run expanded from three weeks to six.
Cecil Beaton, one of the world’s most celebrated designers and photographers, was assigned by British Vogue to capture Thompson’s elusive mystique for a spread in its November issue. “One of the misfortunes about being a card manipulator is that nobody can ever write about you,” Beaton recalled. “I feel much the same way about Kay Thompson, whose magic is similarly incommunicable . . . The facts about her are that she sings and prances in cabaret between Los Angeles and Istanbul; that she is skeletal, hatchet-faced, blonde and American; that she wears tight, tapering slacks, and moves like a mountain goat . . . The proper language in which to review her is not English at all but Esperanto. Or possibly Morse code.”
While in London, Kay rented a place near Noël Coward’s 17 Gerald Road apartment and took an immediate liking to his local entourage, led by his thirty-two-year-old lover, Graham Payn, and his confidant-biographer, Cole Lesley.
“She had a flat round the corner at Chesham Place,” noted Cole Lesley, “came at weekends to White Cliffs [Coward’s seaside home at the White Cliffs of Dover] and as good as lived with us at Gerald Road where she flew to the piano to improvise and compose and ate nothing except very thin slices of bread burnt black, piled thick with Tiptree jam.”
Kay fell in love with London and returned often to perform at the Cafe de Paris. She also wrote songs for two hit UK shows: The Lyric Revue (1951) and The Globe Revue (1952-1954), both featuring Graham Payn.
When Kay's Eloise books were published in England, she was brought over for a very nigh-profile publicity tour in 1958. Here is an excerpt about that...
Lagging one year behind their respective American release dates, Kay Thompson's Eloise books were being published in the United Kingdom by Max Reinhardt, Ltd. (no relation to the Austrian director). The first book had become a huge bestseller on British soil, and, according to historian Judith Adamson, it had gotten an “enthusiastic” endorsement from Queen Elizabeth, who “had read the book to her children”—nine-year-old Prince Charles and seven-year-old Princess Anne.
Anticipation was building to a fever pitch for Eloise in Paris, due to be launched in the UK on October 6, 1958. So, when Reinhardt invited Thompson to come to England for an all-expense-paid publicity tour, she readily accepted—especially since the trip would conveniently double as research for Eloise in London.
Media coverage of Kay’s advent rivaled a papal visitation. With the blessing of Buckingham Palace, the Foreign Secretary of Great Britain, Baron Selwyn-Lloyd, was dispatched to London Airport for a ceremonial greeting amid a phalanx of paparazzi and gawkers. One of Selwyn-Lloyd’s bodyguards was assigned to protect Thompson from the waiting mob.
Amid an explosion of flashbulbs, Kay joked, “I love this hick town!”
Then she was whisked via Rolls-Royce motorcade to the Savoy, where, dressed to kill in black Dior, she held court at a press conference in the illustrious Lancaster Ballroom—site of the 1953 Coronation Ball for Queen Elizabeth.
Tirelessly, Thompson toured stores in and around London for book signings and readings. Merchants created elaborate displays with Eloise dolls, bottles of French champagne, extra-long loaves of French bread, and live petting exhibits for Eloise's pet, Skipperdee the Turtle.
Kay also did a slew of radio and television shows. The most prestigious was on October 8, 1958, when she appeared on the live debut broadcast of Riverside One (BBC-TV), a top-drawer variety show produced by British showman Francis Essex and regularly hosted by actress Margaret Lockwood (star of Hitchcock’s The Lady Vanishes). Sharing the guest roster with actor Trevor Howard and several others, Kay performed her nightclub staple “I Love a Violin” and her Top 40 hit “Eloise.”
“Kay was the most expensive guest we had on the entire series, by a wide margin,” Francis Essex related in 2008. “I still have the cost reports right here, which show that I paid Trevor Howard £262 [U.S. $733] for his appearance; Margaret Lockwood, the regular host, was paid £210 [U.S. $588] per show; and all the other guests that first week were paid around £190 [U.S. $532]—except for one person: Kay Thompson. She cost me £750 [U.S. $2,100] off my budget! Kay was in a class by herself.”
Having succumbed to Thompson’s chicanery, Brits were simply head over heels for Eloise, with the venerable London Times jointly placing Eloise and Eloise in Paris among its “Top 10 Literary Pleasures of 1958.” The newspaper’s year-end round-up declared, “For sophisticated amusement they cannot be easily bettered.”
At the end of her British tour, Kay wrote in TV Times (the British equivalent of TV Guide), “I am going to swoosh back to America with strict instructions from my publishers to write Eloise in London, which will be great fun.” According to her preliminary notes, Eloise was destined to cross paths with Nanny’s brother, “a bobby in Piccadilly Circus.”
Unfortunately, her American publisher convinced her to postpone writing Eloise in London so she could do Eloise in Moscow instead. When the Moscow book didn't sell as well as the first three Eloise books, Kay got discouraged and put all Eloise projects on hold. But her love of London never subsided and she often returned there for visits.
The Kay Thompson biography and the Eloise children's books, which Kay Thompson wrote and Hilary Knight illustrated, I think, are the most marketable products I have seen in the book world for a long time. This is purely from the point of view of an avid reader and a mother to a little girl who is an Eloise in the making herself. I could see these books being very popular here in the UK. Have you ever been to the UK and promoted the whole Kay Thompson /Eloise package? Would that be something you would consider in the future?
I adore London but I haven't been there is many years. If I could get someone to foot the bill for the expenses, I would love to promote my Kay Thompson book there. Any ideas? For a UK label called Sepia Records (owned and operated by the wonderful Richard Tay), I produced and annotated a 3-CD set called THINK PINK! A KAY THOMPSON PARTY featuring 75 tracks of Kay Thompson's music and comedy recordings. So, between the book and the CD set, there would be plenty to promote!
I feel you caught a remarkable piece of history and many women reading the book, would become fascinated by Kay Thompson's remarkable life. From a writer's point of view, your passion in writing the book along with the extraordinary story, captivates the reader. What made you write Kay Thompson's biography? And did you expect to uncover some of the amazing information about this women's life that you did?
My mother and my two older sisters introduced the Eloise books to me when I was very young, so Kay Thompson had a seminal influence over my childhood. Just like Eloise, I wanted to live in The Plaza in New York, have the run of the hotel, and order room service. When I got older, I saw the movie FUNNY FACE and was blown away by this cyclone of a woman who was the fashion magazine editor and opened the movie with her anthem "Think Pink!" When I discovered that this was Kay Thompson, the very same lady who had written the Eloise books, I was hooked. I had to know more about her -- but there wasn't much out there. No books had been written about her. But, every time I found out something new about this remarkable woman, it was always some jaw-dropping accomplishment that, incredibly, was not common knowledge. After she died in 1998, I decided it was high time somebody wrote a book about this unsung heroine -- and I was the one with the passion to do it. So I started the project as a hobby. Had I known then that it would take 10 years of research and over 200 interviews with her friends and colleagues, I would have been too intimidated to get started. My naivete served me well. The project just grew and grew from there until it took on a life of its own, like a runaway train that I couldn't stop until it was done. Obsession is another word for it -- and I am guilty as charged.
The Eloise books are just simply divine and totally enchanting. Is there any chance in the near future that Kay Thompson Funny Face To Eloise alongside the Eloise books which are currently all available on Amazon, will ever be available in paperback here in the UK? Say in department stores around about Christmas? I'm living in hope!
From your lips to Godzilla. That would be very nice. Contact your local bookstores in the UK and urge them to do just that!
After reading the book I actually felt I wanted more and the first thing I looked for was a movie about this woman's life. Unfortunately I wasn't able to find anything. Will there ever be one?
A movie about Kay Thompson is one of my dreams that I hope will someday come true. Conventional wisdom among the powers-that-be in Hollywood is that Kay Thompson is not well-known enough, but I think if a bankable movie star decided she was born to play Kay Thompson, they'd listen.
Which actress would you choose to play the role of Kay Thompson?
After just seeing actress Helen Mirren's performance in Hitchcock, don't you think she would make a fantastic Kay Thompson? I know she's British but she's very versatile!
Helen Mirren would be exquisite! She's brilliant in everything she does. So, next time you see her, slip a copy of the book under her arm.
A favourite paragraph of mine in the book is your quote from celebrated Science Fiction author Ray Bradbury whom Kay helped launch his career."I was in love with the suspense program" Bradbury recalled. "I was publishing stories in Weird Tales and various other pulp magazines, which gave me the courage to make up a package of short stories and mail them to Bill Spier." In April 1946, Bradbury got a call to come for a meeting at the Spiers home in Bel Air. "When I rang the doorbell," Bradbury explained, "the person who answered the door was an explosion named Kay Thompson. She welcomed me like an old friend because she had read my short stories, too, and she thought they were terrific. I was in love instantly. She dragged me in to the living room, sat me down, and brought me a glass of wine, so we were off to a great start".Before Bill arrived, Kay and Ray had time for a little chitchat. "I knew that she was occasionally doing choreography for Judy Garland (in Ziegfeld Follies, which had just opened that month). We discussed that just a little bit but she mainly wanted to know about me, which was very nice. She made me feel like I'd been established for a lifetime. That was part of her character. She was always outsized-the grand gesture, the overstatement-but sincere. It was not fake. Her enthusiasm was so wonderful and it certainly didn't hurt because when Bill finally joined us, he ended up buying one story at that first meeting." The acquisition was Kay's favourite, "And so Died Riabouchinska," a chilling murder mystery about a vaudeville ventriloquist and his dummy, and it proved to be the lucky break that launched Bradbury's prolific career in movies, television, and books.
Yes, leave it to a brilliant writer like Ray Bradbury to come up with the perfect word to describe Kay Thompson: an explosion!
The advice I always give is to never give up. If you are truly passionate about your art, nothing can stand in your way. A young aspiring actor once said to me, "I want to come to Hollywood and try my luck at being an actor. I'll give it two years and if it doesn't work out, then I'll go back home and get a regular job." My advice to him was, "Don't bother. If you are not passionate enough to commit to a lifetime, then you're in the wrong business. Save yourself the trouble and get that regular job now." Tough love, but it's the truth.
Thank you so much for your time Sam.
Thank you very much, Fiona! Please invite your readers to explore my Kay Thompson Website featuring hundreds of pages of exclusive, free material that I couldn't fit into the book! www.KayThompsonWebsite.com
Cheers! Sam
Sam Irvin, through his tireless devotion, was able to document an incredible piece of history, the life of iconic Kay Thompson.
I came to the conclusion after reading the book that Kay Thompson played a key role in making film and the arts an integral part of our lives in todays society. She mentored and coached the biggest names in show business, Garland, Monroe, Sinatra and many, many more and in return those stars paved the way to make Hollywood what it is today.
It is to writers like Sam Irvin that we owe a debt of gratitude, we need to say thanks. Without his years of research and his meticulous documentation we would have otherwise never have known just what an incredible influence Kay Thompson was in an industry that many of us take for granted. Sam Irvin is an inspiration to all writers. and I believe he deserves the highest accolade. We must never forget the wonderful people who were here before us because without their contributions we would never have evolved into what we have acheived in the Arts here in the twenty first century and long may it continue.
Thank you so much for dropping by. I hope you have enjoyed this post it is definitely one I will truly always treasure.
Listed below is Sam Irvin's biography from wikapedia
Sam Irvin was born and raised in Asheville, North Carolina. In 1964, when he was eight years old, Irvin went on a family trip to California where he was able to tour various movie studios. At Warner Brothers, he watched an elaborate sequence being filmed for Blake Edwards's The Great Race starringTony Curtis, Jack Lemmon and Natalie Wood. In a giant water tank on a sound stage, Irvin watched with wide eyes as a nighttime storm scene unfolded, featuring antique cars floating across the Bering Strait on icebergs.[citation needed] From that moment on, he decided he wanted to direct movies.[citation needed] Commandeering his father's Super 8mm home movie camera, Irvin directed numerous horror movie shorts, including one starring his younger brother, Tim, as Dracula wearing a black beach towel for a cape, plastic fangs, and lots of ketchup.[citation needed]Like the young boy in Cinema Paradiso, Irvin spent much of his youth in movie theaters. His grandfather, Warren Irvin, was the district manager for Wilby-Kincey Theaters, a chain of cinemas throughout the Southeast. And his father, Sam Irvin Sr., co-owned Irvin-Fuller Theaters, a competing chain with cinemas in North and South Carolina. During his youth, Irvin worked in these theaters in every capacity, from popping popcorn to tearing tickets to organizing horror movie kiddie matinees (with an emphasis on Vincent Price, Roger Corman, and Hammer Films). Later, during his college years, he worked for Irvin-Fuller Theaters as its Advertising and Publicity Manager, spearheading a record-breaking year-long run of Silver Streak starringGene Wilder and Richard Pryor at the Gamecock Cinema in Columbia, South Carolina.As a teenager, he edited and published four annual issues of Bizarre (1972–75), a fanzine on fantasy, horror and science fiction films, for which he twice traveled to England to conduct in-person interviews with the likes of Vincent Price, Christopher Lee (on the set of the James Bond movie The Man with the Golden Gun), Peter Cushing, Diana Rigg, Ingrid Pitt, Jane Seymour, Joan Collins, Terence Fisher, Freddie Francis, and Sir James Carreras and his son, Michael Carreras (of Hammer Film Productions), among many others. (See retrospective 13-page spread on the history of Bizarre in Richard Klemensen's Little Shoppe of Horrors, issue number 27, October 2011.)In 1978, Irvin graduated from the University of South Carolina with a Bachelor of Arts in Media Arts. While attending the university, he was the film critic for The Gamecock, the campus newspaper, and won a student film award for his thesis short film. He was also chairman of the University of South Carolina Film Committee that ran a year-round cinema program at the campus theater.During his summer break in 1977, Irvin interned on the Chicago location shooting for Brian De Palma’s The Fury starring Kirk Douglas, John Cassavetes, Amy Irving and Charles Durning. He worked on the feature as a production assistant and extra, and also wrote a journal on the making of the movie that was published in Cinefantastique magazine, Vol. 7, No. 2, 1978. Irvin also conducted an exclusive interview with Amy Irving in which, for the first time anywhere, she discussed her relationship with Steven Spielberg; it was published in Cinefantastique, Vol 6, No. 4 / Vol. 7, No. 1, a special double Star Wars issue, 1978.After graduating from the University of South Carolina in May 1978, Irvin worked as the Associate Producer and Production Manager on Brian De Palma's Home Movies starring Kirk Douglas,Nancy Allen, and Keith Gordon. Then, Irvin worked as De Palma's assistant on Dressed to Kill starring Michael Caine, Angie Dickinson, Nancy Allen and Keith Gordon.He also worked closely with De Palma on several projects in development, including Blow Out (which eventually De Palma directed, starring John Travolta and Nancy Allen), and Prince of the City(which was originally going to star Robert De Niro from a script by David Rabe, but was ultimately directed by Sidney Lumet starring Treat Williams).Irvin gave up his position as De Palma's assistant to produce The First Time, a coming-of-age comedy for which De Palma served as a credited Creative Consultant. Released by New Line Cinema, the film starred Tim Choate, Wendie Jo Sperber, Wallace Shawn, Cathryn Damon and Jane Badler.During the 1980s, Irvin served as Vice President of Marketing for three film distributors: United Artists Classics, Spectrafilm, and Vestron. During this period, Irvin won Hollywood Reporter Key Art Awards for designing the movie posters for Francois Truffaut’s Confidentially Yours and Paul Verhoeven’s The Fourth Man. He also helped spearhead the record-breaking year-long run of Jean-Jacques Beineix's Diva in New York City.Irvin's first directorial effort, which he also wrote and produced, was the 1985 dark comedy short Double Negative, which starred Bill Randolph, Justin Henry, Wayne Knight, and William Finley.[2]It premiered as an official selection at the Sundance Film Festival and subsequently played theatrically in New York and Los Angeles. Janet Maslin of The New York Times wrote that it was "an exceptionally promising first effort."[3]Irvin went on to direct more than a dozen feature films, including:Guilty as Charged starring Rod Steiger, Lauren Hutton, Heather Graham, and Isaac Hayes. (The film won the Gold Special Jury Award for Best Independent Feature at Houston Worldfest.)Out There a Showtime Original Movie starring Billy Campbell, Billy Bob Thornton, Rod Steiger, Jill St. John, Paul Dooley, Robert Picardo, David Rasche, Bill Cobbs, and Julie Brown.Acting on Impulse a Showtime Original Movie starring C. Thomas Howell, Linda Fiorentino, Nancy Allen, Paul Bartel, Mary Woronov, Isaac Hayes, and Cassandra Peterson.Fat Rose and Squeaky a Showtime Original Movie starring Louise Fletcher, Cicely Tyson and Julie Brown.Elvira's Haunted Hills starring Cassandra Peterson as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, and Richard O'Brien. (The film won the Audience Award at the 2002 Provincetown International Film Festival.)From his own original screenplay, Irvin directed the Showtime Original Movie Kiss of a Stranger starring Mariel Hemingway, Dyan Cannon, Corbin Bernsen and David Carradine.Irvin directed the cult sci-fi westerns Oblivion and its sequel Oblivion 2: Backlash, starring Julie Newmar, George Takei, Isaac Hayes, Meg Foster and Maxwell Caulfield. (Oblivion won the Gold Award for Best Fantasy / Science Fiction Feature at Houston Worldfest.)He also directed the Disney Channel time-travel pirate fantasy Magic Island starring Zachery Ty Bryan and French Stewart.For television, Irvin directed several episodes of Comedy Central's Strip Mall starring Julie Brown, Cindy Williams and Stella Stevens.Irvin directed three full seasons of Dante's Cove starring Tracy Scoggins, Charlie David, Jenny Shimizu, Thea Gill, Stephen Amell, Booboo Stewart, and Reichen Lehmkuhl. (Irvin also co-wrote the series' international hit theme song, "Dying to Be with You").Also for television, Irvin directed the opening of The 100th Anniversary of the World Series (October 18, 2003), for the Fox Network (a "through the ages" montage featuring the music of and starring Sheila E).Irvin directed several segments for the Fox Network's 2004 Super Bowl XXXVIII including several comedy sketches starring Eugene Levy as a nutty gadget inventor trying to improve the entertainment value of football. Other vignettes included Will Smith, Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon. Irvin also directed the surrealistic opening battle between ninja warriors and football players.And, for the Fox Network opening of the 2007 Allstate Sugar Bowl, Irvin directed "Dueling Musicians," shot on the streets of New Orleans (broadcast January 3, 2007).After directing several American-financed films in Romania, Irvin was invited by Romanian-based Mediapro Studios to direct Garcea si oltenii, a spin-off of Romania's most popular television show, starring a Monty Python-like sketch comedy group known as Vacante Mare. It became the highest grossing motion picture in Romanian history up to that time, beating the previous record-holder, James Cameron's Titanic.Also in Romania, Irvin directed I Will Return A Man, a rock opera performed by the Romanian rock group Vama Veche, broadcast live on television from the National Theater in Bucharest. It was an anti-war musical in the same genre as Pink Floyd's The Wall.His credits as a producer include:Associate producing Brian De Palma's Home Movies starring Kirk Douglas, Nancy Allen and Keith Gordon. (Irvin also served as Production Manager.)Co-executive producing Bill Condon's Academy Award-winning film Gods and Monsters starring Sir Ian McKellen, Brendan Fraser and Lynn Redgrave. (Irvin also co-directed the "Making of" documentary for the DVD, entitled The World of Gods and Monsters: A Journey with James Whale.)Co-producing Greg Berlanti's The Broken Hearts Club starring Timothy Olyphant, Dean Cain, Zach Braff, John Mahoney, Nia Long and Justin Theroux.Co-executive producing Bob Clark's I'll Remember April starring Haley Joel Osment, Pat Morita, Mark Harmon, Pam Dawber and Paul Dooley. (Irvin also was the second-unit director.)Co-executive producing Big Monster on Campus (aka Boltneck: Teen Frankenstein) starring Ryan Reynolds, Shelley Duvall, Matthew Lawrence and Judge Reinhold.Associate producing The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human starring Mackenzie Astin, David Hyde Pierce, Carmen Electra and Lucy Liu.Associate producing Sticky Fingers starring Helen Slater, Melanie Mayron, Eileen Brennan, Carol Kane, Christopher Guest, Danitra Vance, and Loretta Devine.Producing The First Time starring Tim Choate, Wendie Jo Sperber, Wallace Shawn, Cathryn Damon and Jane Badler. Creative Consultant: Brian De Palma.Irvin's first book, Kay Thompson: From Funny Face to Eloise, was published by Simon & Schuster (November 2010) and was honored by Kirkus Reviews and The Theatre Library Association Awards as one of the "Best Biographies of 2010." Acclaimed by columnist Liz Smith as "a smashing work" and by entertainer Michael Feinstein as "one of the best showbiz bios I've ever read," this comprehensive biography covers the life and career of the legendary singer-actress-composer-arranger-author-fashionista Kay Thompson. She was the mentor/best friend of Judy Garland, the vocal guru to Frank Sinatra and Lena Horne, the mentor and longtime lover of Andy Williams, and the godmother/Svengali to Liza Minnelli (who recreated Thompson's nightclub act in the 2009 Tony Award-winning event Liza's at the Palace).In connection with his research on the life of Thompson, Irvin served as a historical consultant on the Tony Award-winning Broadway event Liza's at the Palace; he produced and annotated the 2009 3-CD box set compilation Think Pink! A Kay Thompson Party (Sepia Records); and he appeared in and consulted on Paramount Home Entertainment's documentary Kay Thompson: Think Pink! (an extra included in Paramount's Centennial Collection DVD edition of Stanley Donen's Funny Face starring Audrey Hepburn, Fred Astaire, and Kay Thompson).As a journalist, Irvin has recently written articles for Little Shoppe of Horrors magazine, including an interview he conducted with Richard O'Brien of Rocky Horror Show fame.Movie project in development: Irvin has recently collaborated with Cassandra Peterson on the original screenplay Elvira Vs. the Vampire Vixens, a horror spoof for which he is attached as director and co-producer (with Peterson, who will also star once again as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark).Between projects, Irvin is an adjunct faculty member at the University of Southern California School of Cinematic Arts where he teaches graduate courses on directing.He resides in Los Angeles with Gary Bowers, his partner since 1982.[edit]Filmography
- As director
- Double Negative (1985)
- Guilty as Charged (1991)
- Acting on Impulse (1993) (TV)
- Oblivion (1994)
- Out There (1995) (TV)
- Magic Island (1995) (V)
- Oblivion 2: Backlash (1996)
- Kiss of a Stranger (1999)
- The World of Gods and Monsters: A Journey with James Whale (1999) (V)
- Strip Mall (2000) (TV series)
- Elvira's Haunted Hills (2001)
- Garcea si oltenii (2001)
- A Very Cool Christmas (2004) (TV) aka Too Cool for Christmas
- Deadly Skies (2005) (TV) aka Force of Impact
- Fat Rose and Squeaky (2006)
- Dante's Cove (12 episodes, 2005–2007) (TV)
- As producer
- Home Movies (1980)
- The First Time (1983)
- Double Negative (1985)
- Sticky Fingers (1988)
- When Time Expires (1997) (TV)
- Error in Judgment (1998)
- Gods and Monsters (1998)
- The World of Gods and Monsters: A Journey with James Whale (1999) (V)
- I'll Remember April (1999)
- Ancient Evil: Scream of the Mummy (1999)
- The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human (1999)
- The Broken Hearts Club: A Romantic Comedy (2000)
- Big Monster on Campus (2000) aka Boltneck: Teen Frankenstein
- Defending the Super$ave (2001)
- Just Can't Get Enough (2001)
- As actor
- Guilty as Charged (1991)
- Oblivion (1994)
- Magic Island (1995) (V)
- Oblivion 2: Backlash (1996)
- Garcea si oltenii (2001)
- Dante's Cove (1 episode, 2005) (TV)
- As writer
- Double Negative (1985)
- Sweet Deception (1998) (TV)
- Kiss of a Stranger (1999)
- As author
- Kay Thompson: From Funny Face to Eloise (published by Simon & Schuster, 2010)
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